can anyone proof read my work?

I would feel worried about my own safety because back then, bikes were just starting to come out and barely had any safety features, I also might be scared due to the fact that I cannot ride a bike properly, which, is a bit depressing, especially at my age, considering that my peers would be able to ride a bike. The only thin I can ride would be a scooter, though I would enjoy riding a bike if they had more safety features to make up for my lack of balance. I really would like to lean to ride a bike even though I enjoy walking as riding a bike would get me to places faster, learning to ride a bike would also enjoyable because i'd be able to partake in biking activities with my friends, such as, mountain biking, racing, ect. If i were to learn to ride a bike, I think I would have to clothe myself with safety gear. Riding a bike just seems like a very enjoyable activity as well as the banter that would happen with people (like myself) that are unable to ride a bike

Explanation:

Explanation: lmk if you copy it so i can delete it so it doesn't show up if your teacher thinks you're plagiarizing

justastren justastren · Answer 2 · 2022-05-24T21:33:58+02:00

Answer:
Revised Paragraph

I would feel worried about my own safety back then because bikes were just starting to come out and lacked many safety features that we have today. I would also feel scared due to the fact that I can barely ride a bike, and having little to no safety features would cause a lot of trouble. I would like to ride a bike if they had more features that would make me less scared because even though I can walk, I would enjoy getting to my destination at a much faster pace. Also, many of my friends like to go on bike trails and I would be happy to accompany them. I would also wear safety gear to decrease my chances of getting badly hurt. Despite the safety concerns, riding a bike seems fun in general. For example, going on bike trails, doing tricks, and having a good time with friends. I hope in the near future, I will be able to show everyone that I can ride a bike well.

Explanation

Just a few tips to improve your writing:

1. Avoid unnecessary context and going off topic. For example, "I can't even ride a bike which is depressing at my age...the only thing I can ride is a scooter". Even though those topics may seem interesting to you, they really aren't the topic you're writing about.

2. Make sure your "I"s are capital in any situation.

3. Don't forget to make sure your commas are in the right spot.

4. Don't give up! I believe that your writing will improve greatly with time:)

Hope this helps:) Goodluck!